Monday, 11 June 2012

Boundaries and Personalities Should Be Respected

Everybody's different, and when you're in a mature dating relationship, you can and should
acknowledge that. In a mature relationship, the lines are drawn, but blurred. Basically, things that
men used to do can be done by women. And things women used to do can be done by men.
Surprisingly, this works well in almost every situation. No matter who you are, you can and should
contribute to your relationship.

Practical Applications for Contributing to Your Mature Dating Relationship
When you're in a relationship, there are lots of things that you have to figure out. The problem is
that sometimes, a lot of times, the things people want aren't the same. Both people want different
things, or even the same things, but you have different ways of doing it. Even if you both have the
same ultimate goal: finding a strong relationship that will last. How do you split the responsibilities?
Sometimes you don't.

o Leadership.
Though leadership is typically the responsibility of the man, both people can step up. However,
while both people can take the lead, in a more traditional relationship, when you really clash, the
woman should yield. And in an untraditional relationship, anything goes. Dating when you are
older requires that you take charge, at least sometimes.

o Shopping.
Both people can do the grocery shopping. It doesn't matter who does it. Chances are if you go
shopping with the person with whom you're in a mature dating relationship, you'll both drive one
another crazy. One person might bargain shop. The other might buy only the expensive, name
brand items. So you might need to work on things to decide how you will arrange it. You can do it
together or you can choose one of you to go, whichever works best.

o Nurturing.
You and the person you're in the mature relationship with will need to nurture one another. It's not
solely the responsibility of one person. It's something you need to work on together so that you're
both satisfied. However, chances are good you'll nurture one another in different ways. Hopefully,
the way you nurture one another is what you need.

o Asking someone out on a date.
There's nothing wrong with asking someone out on a date. And whether you're male or female,
you can do the asking. Some people feel uncomfortable asking or if they think they should have
done the asking, but the truth is, if you find someone who doesn't like the way you do things, you'll
find someone else who does. When you're in a mature dating relationship, you need to be willing
to take the initiative. And that includes asking out the person you're interested in.

o Paying.
Both of you can and should pay. If you have a job, you should contribute. And no matter who you
are, you shouldn't date someone who doesn't have a job, unless you're both students. You don't
want someone who is going to mooch off of you the way they've probably mooched off friends and
family. When you're in a mature dating relationship, you're both contributing to the relationship,
and that includes offering to pay for dinner or a movie. Even if it's only every once in awhile.
Mature dating is hard work. When you're in a relationship with someone, chances are good they'll
have different expectations than you do. They might even want things that are different than what
you want. When you're working on being mature while dating, you need to work on it to make it
work. That includes respecting the other person, his or her boundaries and what he or she thinks
is right in a relationship.

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