Communicating is Key to the Success of any Relationship

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Communicating effectively in any mature dating relationship is a two way street. It is not only about talking, it is also about listening. There is no point if one person is talking all the time. One way communication will make no improvements to your relationship. If the other person listens and interacts, then it means you have successfully got your message across and the other person is trying to help resolve it and come to a consensus. Sometimes, you may not have explained what you are trying to say, and this may mean you have to clarify what you are saying and make sure that your partner understands exactly what you mean. Remember that a successful dialogue is when you have gotten your point across, not when you have finished saying what you wanted to say.

Sometimes, a simple misunderstanding can lead to a lot of unwanted issues. It could be something a person said, or something that may be talked about. An issue can never be resolved unless you come out with it in the open. If you truly want to solve the problems and develop a mature dating relationship, you have to learn to be vocal about it and willing to explain what made you think in that manner. Mature dating starts with a good understanding of how to communicate.

Often, mature dating couples try to be too nice to each other and don't actively exchange what they feel about things. If you are trying to tell yourself to not speak up because you want the relationship to last, then think about the day when it all comes out at once. This might probably be the day that your relationship might come to an end. Hence, a smart thing to do is resolving issues as they happen rather than wait for them all to come out in the end and cause more damage than they were supposed to.

A good tip for effective communication in a mature dating relationship is the interest you show in the other persons problems. In a dating relationship, you must be willing to make sacrifices as well as ready to make some compromises to make the other person feel comfortable and cared for. Thus,if the other person is saying something that may not really be something you care about, you still need to have the interest to listen to it and then provide feedback. There is no point in trying to act like you care because it will eventually backfire and put you in a tough spot later on.

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Most communication issues stem from a place of selfishness. We want something but can't have it or we're restricted from getting it because of the other person, so we get angry and we connive to get it. Or it could be the pride that comes with selfishness. So many couples end up in arguments and forget what they're even arguing about. In this situation it is pride that is fueling the negative emotions. Learning to submit to one another and live humbly will put out any fires that burn from selfishness and pride which is the first step to developing a mature dating relationship.

Mature Dating is FAR More Popular Than You Think!

You may feel like you're the only one; like all your friends have married and moved on with life.  Contrary to popular thought, mature dating is more popular than many think. Over the last decade mature dating has risen in popularity and more and more old people are finding greater fulfillment in romantic relationships. Many older people stay away from dating because they feel like they have no single friends, think they are too old, don't want to look like the old person at a bar filled with young people and many just don't know where to go. These reasons should never hinder anyone from dating especially those who desire a serious and committed relationship.

You may feel like all of your friends have moved on and gotten married. You may feel like you can no longer relate to them, now that they're consumed with children, grandchildren, husband or wife and so on.  If this is you and dating is a desire of yours, you may have to get out of your comfort zone and meet new people. There are a lot of groups and clubs available for people searching for mature dating. Whatever you interests may be, you are bound to find an organization of older people that believe in the same ideals and convictions as you.

Some people who are interested in dating may believe they are too old to date. As long as you have breath in your lungs and hope in your heart you are never too old to date. As you venture out you will be surprised to discover how many other people are in the same boat. Mature dating has gained a lot of momentum and has surprised many others like you. Love is without age and many have discovered the love of their life in their later years - and so can you.
You may hinder yourself from going out to common places because you don't want to look like the old person at a bar with all young people.  Who said you had to go to the local college pub? There are many bars, coffee shops and other public meeting places that are geared for those interested in mature dating. Many clubs are strictly centered on a more mature crowd. You can look in the local yellow pages or use Google to locate these in your city.  If you don't know where to go in search for dating relationships, do a little research and you'll soon discover a world of opportunities. Many religious and nonreligious organizations have gatherings, meetings and events planned for those seeking mature dating opportunities. There are also local websites established with message boards to keep the mature dating community informed of events and gatherings in your area.

Don't let the misconceptions of mature dating keep you isolated and alone. There are plenty of opportunities surrounding those who are seeking out dating relationships. It may take some time, a little effort and a burst of hope, but in time you'll see the full reward.

Mature Dating - A New Dimension

Yes, there is always a second round for the experienced majority. After long, exhaustive years of being in a relationship and ending it for some sensible reason, there will always be a room for new opportunities of finding a new romance for a mature relationship. That is the essence of mature dating.
A person could have been out of relationship because of serious reasons like losing a spouse out of death or after undergoing a smooth divorce. Who can ever judge the fruitful journey one wants to seal close in chapters of life? Mature dating could be the next step in entering the new dimension of friendship-opening oneself to a fresh relationship with all the optimism that it will be a unique continuation of what has been started in the past.
How can one start a new love affair while kids are growing up? It is quite worrisome to imagine dealing with this matter, but the truth is, children are also sensitive to the need of their lonely parent. Children who are realizing the value of parent's companionship will not find it hard to adhere to the concept of a parent going out in pursuit of a mature date. Actually, mature dating has passed the test of time. It is more patient, not impulsive and very broad. It is a kind of romance built on maturity.

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A person who reached the middle years has almost seen the whole perspective of building a good relationship. They already realized the facts, except that past mistakes and factors could have affected the means of solving errors. Deep inside it is more careful, probably inhibited, but will be inclined to adjustments.
If one wants to start a new life by assuming a new date, it is important to pay attention to family complexities first. If a person is widow, there is no hassle at all. Grown up children will even encourage the parent to start a new life with a new love affair. The only matters to consider are the assets and the proper arrangements in case there are legalities involved. It would be better to
consult this with a lawyer for the best advice before plunging to a new marriage.
For divorced person, the primal issue is the children. Are they ready to live with a new guardian?  How will it be smooth to go with a new relationship, while the shadow of the ex-husband is still lurking around? Ironically, the world goes on with widows, widowers and divorcees living happily ever after with their mature love affair, which started as harmless date.
Friendship is the best ingredient of mature dating. Endless conversation about minor daily encounters could spice up the mood of a conversation. When the relationship starts as platonic interaction, the barrier is easier to bridge. There are many things to talk about from philosophical exchange of ideas to gossip if it has to be.
Based on interest, two people could start a deep conversation about what they believe as a strong principle, making harmless debate about it until they come up with a merging thought agreeable to each other. They could engage in group activities like sports or gathering that suits their interest, watching movies, hanging around green gardens and boat riding. Fancy dining could start a romantic mood, still enjoying the good companionship until midnight. With mature dating, no parental consent and curfews. It's simply better!

How Mature Dating is Different

Definition of 'mature' in online dating.
It is slightly different from 'senior' which has more of an age implication, though the two terms
usually apply together. We don't in general mean people who are looking for a partner much older
than themselves (this is relatively unusual and a specialised dating area).
By 'mature' we mean people who have reached a stage in life (which may not be age related ie
senior) when they have experienced one or maybe more serious long term relationships - they
probably have children, and very probably a divorce (or two, even more) in their history. They have
worked for a living and learned the lessons of the workplace - indeed their career might still be
continuing or even ended. They are looking for a partner who is round about the same age or of
the same generation and they have a fairly well developed idea of the kind of person they are
seeking - their attributes, habits and interests - eg fun loving guy, must be able to laugh at himself,
solvent with a full head of hair, likes eating out and hiking.
They are probably over 35 in age, maybe a lot older, but remember that there are people who can
be mature (using our definition) even in their mid twenties. Hence not 'senior' but 'mature'.
So, mature people have a collection of 'baggage' - lessons learned, good and bad memories,
probably family and community relationships, networks and responsibilities.
Compare this with people who are younger and still looking for the 'right' person first time around.
Their career might not yet be established, and with social and community networks being less
developed they are more flexible about moving home and less 'set in their ways'. They probably
have less specific ideas about what they are looking for in a partner. Conversely, mature people
may attach less importance to things such as wealth, perhaps having formed the opinion that
money doesn't buy happiness.
How does mature dating differ?
Usually, mature people engaging in the online dating process have relationships which have
ended (many would say failed),often with pain attached. Any pain will have instilled caution and a
natural desire to avoid similar situations again. Pain might originate from, for example, infidelity,
addictions of one sort or another (drugs including alcohol, gambling, sexual addiction even
addiction to sports), unpleasant personal habits, lack of shared interests. Quite often there will also
be a desire to avoid people who remind them of a former partner.
Also, we have the simple fact that getting to know someone really well takes time - there is so
much more personal history to exchange between 'matures'. It can be quite wearing meeting a
new person every week, and listening to their painful divorce history and about their family issues
takes energy. Taking that forward further, we come to the point where two family networks are
being melded - that is a lot to absorb and manage.
Further, as we said earlier, mature people tend to be older and see life as more finite and probably
'passing by' more quickly. Therefore there can be a pressure to 'get on with it'. This is in conflict
with the caution bred out of historical pain which may exist.
Some mature people may have a sense that they have already experienced the 'real love of their
life' and this could get in the way of a successful new relationship because of the high standard by
which it is being measured (ie their 'real love of their life').
Finally, there is availability of time. With family and social networks on both sides, it can be
challenging for some to find time for the dating process and developing a new relationship. This
can be extremely frustrating for some people, and if you are serious about finding a new partner
then you will have to set aside serious amounts of free time and be flexible about it. This means
that someone starting out on the mature online dating process may have to reconsider their
priorities in other areas.
After all, showing flexibility is about demonstrating a positive attitude to a potential partner for the
rest of one's life, and of the importance of that desire to find a partner.

Learn To Have Patience When You Start Dating

Everyone wants a healthy and successful relationship. No one wants to experience the pain and
hurt of a relationship that ends in fighting, pain and eventual separation. Mature relationships are
what all of our hearts are looking for. We all want to love freely and be loved by others. We want to
be treated correctly, we want to be respected and cherished. Millions of relationships end in
separation every year, not because they just didn't work out but because there wasn't the proper
knowledge and education of what it takes for mature dating.
One of the first foundational attributes to a mature relationship is learning patience. Anything in life
that is worth a lot, costs a lot. Many times we want the end result of happiness and satisfaction
without taking the time to pay the price of sacrifice and effort. Every successful relationship starts
with patience. Patience allows your partner to be human and not feel guilty or less than. When
give the other person to mess up, mistreat you and not always be 100% selfless, you are sowing
patience so that when you mess things up, patience is what you'll receive from them.
One of the opposing attributes that has broken up many relationships is anger. Anger is the
opposite of learning the discipline of patience. We typically exert anger when we feel like we want
or deserve something and someone is standing in the way of us getting or attaining it. Most of the
time these feelings begin in a place of selfishness where anger rears its ugly head.
Mature dating relationships are able to bread peace in the midst of an argument or disagreement.
Peace comes from patience. Instead of retaliated right away, be patient and listen. Be willing to
take the brunt of something for your partner, be willing to let them be wrong without you feeling like
you have to defend yourself or correct them. You'll see the magic patience can have on a heated
argument. Someone has to be the better one or else the argument can turn into a fight and lead to
a lot of pain and regret. When you practice patience it's like you placing water on the fire.
With out the practice of patience your relationship can become a ware very fast. Anger will foster
more anger which fosters wrongful and hurtful words and actions that can have a long effect.
Patience breads peace, love and respect that will foster a healthy environment for the relationship
to mature and grow in true love.
Mature dating takes time and effort. It requires both parties to lay down their lives for the other
person. It requires room for fault and patience to hold your tongue. True love requires time and
willingness to be wrong at times. If you're looking for a mature dating relationship the place to
begin is with your own heart and actions. Patience isn't something that comes naturally to us, it
something that must be developed and put into practice. In the end you'll see how much peace
and love patience will produce.

Boundaries and Personalities Should Be Respected

Everybody's different, and when you're in a mature dating relationship, you can and should
acknowledge that. In a mature relationship, the lines are drawn, but blurred. Basically, things that
men used to do can be done by women. And things women used to do can be done by men.
Surprisingly, this works well in almost every situation. No matter who you are, you can and should
contribute to your relationship.

Practical Applications for Contributing to Your Mature Dating Relationship
When you're in a relationship, there are lots of things that you have to figure out. The problem is
that sometimes, a lot of times, the things people want aren't the same. Both people want different
things, or even the same things, but you have different ways of doing it. Even if you both have the
same ultimate goal: finding a strong relationship that will last. How do you split the responsibilities?
Sometimes you don't.

o Leadership.
Though leadership is typically the responsibility of the man, both people can step up. However,
while both people can take the lead, in a more traditional relationship, when you really clash, the
woman should yield. And in an untraditional relationship, anything goes. Dating when you are
older requires that you take charge, at least sometimes.

o Shopping.
Both people can do the grocery shopping. It doesn't matter who does it. Chances are if you go
shopping with the person with whom you're in a mature dating relationship, you'll both drive one
another crazy. One person might bargain shop. The other might buy only the expensive, name
brand items. So you might need to work on things to decide how you will arrange it. You can do it
together or you can choose one of you to go, whichever works best.

o Nurturing.
You and the person you're in the mature relationship with will need to nurture one another. It's not
solely the responsibility of one person. It's something you need to work on together so that you're
both satisfied. However, chances are good you'll nurture one another in different ways. Hopefully,
the way you nurture one another is what you need.

o Asking someone out on a date.
There's nothing wrong with asking someone out on a date. And whether you're male or female,
you can do the asking. Some people feel uncomfortable asking or if they think they should have
done the asking, but the truth is, if you find someone who doesn't like the way you do things, you'll
find someone else who does. When you're in a mature dating relationship, you need to be willing
to take the initiative. And that includes asking out the person you're interested in.

o Paying.
Both of you can and should pay. If you have a job, you should contribute. And no matter who you
are, you shouldn't date someone who doesn't have a job, unless you're both students. You don't
want someone who is going to mooch off of you the way they've probably mooched off friends and
family. When you're in a mature dating relationship, you're both contributing to the relationship,
and that includes offering to pay for dinner or a movie. Even if it's only every once in awhile.
Mature dating is hard work. When you're in a relationship with someone, chances are good they'll
have different expectations than you do. They might even want things that are different than what
you want. When you're working on being mature while dating, you need to work on it to make it
work. That includes respecting the other person, his or her boundaries and what he or she thinks
is right in a relationship.

Looking to MIngle with other Mature Singles?

Are you a single looking to mingle with others? just like them. A lot of singles are wondering
where they can find other singles in their same situation.
In response several of my single parent friends have suggested the following general common
sense starting points for those seeking to mingle with single parents:
Decide what your passion is, and go where you will meet others doing the same thing. It's much
easier and more fun to meet and mingle with other single parents if you share common interests.
Follow the kids to their activities and events, as you are sure to meet other single parents in your
position. Kids are often a great point of contact for having good conversations with other single
parents. Mingling with other singles parents in this way and supporting your children at the same
time. What can beat that?
The following are a few places you can start meeting other singles:

• Check out a local church for friendship and ministry opportunities The fellowship you will findthere will greatly benefit both you and your child(ren).

• Volunteer at your local Christian charitable organization. You have so many to choose from, andthis is not only a great way to lift your own depression, but also a great way to meet and mingle while serving the Lord. How can you beat that, right?

• Join a Christian singles group or other kind of support group especially for single parents. Are you a divorced single parent?

• Organize a singles only game night. Just tell each single friend that they have to bring two other singles with them. 

• If you want to mingle online try out the top online Christian dating services, By the way if you're looking for some great Christian dating tips or other dating/relationship advice you can find it all on this singles site http://www.christianmatch.co.za/

• Go to sporting events in town.

• Go on a singles retreat.

• Fact: cooking classes attract lots of singles.

• Check your local newspapers for upcoming events like craft fairs and flea markets, which attract tons of single parents.

If you're a single parent mom who like sports, you can easily find single guys
hanging out at local sports clubs watching the games.
Take a lesson in some kind of coed sport.